Monday, October 14, 2013

No shits; 1 Engagement; Winning the Decade.

Hello my pretties.
Did you all miss me like crazy while I was away?
(everyone nod in unison...)

Ok. Here is the run down, the low down, the down low, the recap, the story of...my weekend.
Dun dun dun...
 
Thursday ended with a bang AKA Rosalie was adorbs in the balloon shirt my mom got for her:

 
 
After we complimented each other's outfits & rocked our shades we ended up eating (SOOL):
 
And by eating, I mean spilling salsa all over my shirt.
FML.
 
After dinner with Auntie Misa & Auntie Sarah we hit up Trader Joe's so I could buy this to make for our cabin trip:
 
I used coconut oil instead of vegetable oil.
I thought it was delicious.
Niki thought it was too cakey & Rach gave me shit for not baking it from scratch...
WHAT YA GONNA DO?
 
While it was baking (and making my mouth water), Rosalie explained the ins & outs of life to auntie...
My little professor.
 
After Rosalie got tired of Marisa & I, she wanted to check out her boyfriennnn on Instagram,
 
Marisa's nephew.
We're in the process of arranging their marriage.
 
And then, while minding my own business I got a pretty significant text from one of the BFF's!
 
Hahaha "thought about fucking with you".
Gets me every time!
 
Not going to lie - I struggle when I watch people in love take the next step in their relationship.
It's hard not to.
Luckily for me (and my selfish ways) I can discuss this on my bloggy & not offend (many) people.
MY BEST FRIEND IS GETTING MARRIED but there is a jaded side of me that's just like, daaaaaamn.
Rachel knows this. She's cooler than me.
But from the very bottom of my black little heart, I could not be happier for her. I don't think I know many others who deserve happiness the way she does.
If I had (more) alcohol, I would toast to you, my dear. Congrats :)
 
This is dumb & irrelevant - but I shaved down my talons again & painted them red. Why? So people think I'm sexy (that's weird Hiskey, on account of you cover said talons with thick, wool socks).
 
But aren't they pretty?
Not the pants. Don't mind the pants.
 
Friday morning went pretty smoothly (which is always unexpected when Niki & I are involved).
We headed north around 9am and about 10am decided we were absolutely famished and had to eat. Right now.
Enter Burgerville:
Yes, that's a cheddar bacon cheeseburger at 10am.
SO WHAT?
 
We finally arrived at the Cabin around 1pm.
Check out our get away:


It was perfect. And just what the doctor ordered!
(Jen: shield your eyes from the taxidermy)
 
Niki's last name is Gorman.
 
Zig Zag river.
 
Nik & I on our tour of the grounds.
 
After we walked around her property, we marched back to the cabin & first thing was first:
 
This stuff was the shit.
I haven't had whiskey in FOREVER.
 
I tried to make Niki take pretty pics with me.
This is what I got.
 
This one was better.
It lead to us talking about all the things that are wrong with us. So. There's that...
 
After a while of self pity, Racho showed up to save the day (jk Niki, calm down):
 
Actually this pic is from Saturday, because I'm rocking my Oregon gear.
DEAL WITH IT.
 
The weekend was lovely.
I hooted & hollered over the Ducks while everyone else thought I was crazy (WON THE DECADE!!!!!!!).
We took some nice walks.
We talked about inappropriate things.
I got to see Lacey & Charlotte - who I rarely ever get to spend time with.
I ate too much, but turns out, I didn't drink too much.
I call this weekend a win.
Except for this. This was the biggest fail of my life:
 


I know you can barely see it, but there is liquid all over that drive way.
From what? FROM ME SHATTERING 2 UNOPENED BOTTLES OF CHARDONNAY.
Worst moment of my life.
 
On the way home from the Cabin, Niki & I stopped in Canby for a few things.
  1. A bike.
  2. A Frack Burger
  3. For me to receive free Nike clothes:
I know people in high places.
What can I say?
Also yes, I am a professional model.
 
Rosalie FINALLY got home around 8pm last night!
She was so happy to see me Niki! WTF?
 
My friends are so obsessed with my kid.
I bet they don't even really like me anymore...
 
It's hard to understand why Rosalie really likes them anyway.
All they do is put her to work:
Niki asked Rosalie to take her boots off for her.
Dear lord, that was a task.
 
We wrapped up Sunday with the premier of The Walking Dead & then bedtime.
I had such a wonderful weekend & am continuously grateful for my friendships.
 
Friendship is a single soul dwelling in two bodies.
                                                               -Aristotle

 

 Anyway. Let's move on from that sentimental crap and get to THE SELFIE OF THE DAY:
 
Happy Freaking Monday.
 
Welp. That's all I got for you today folks.
Just a bunch of bullshit. HOLLABACKGURL.
 
PS I am super backed up from traveling and even after Milk of Magnesia, Fiber Choice, and apricots I have dislodged nothing of significance. You. Are. Welcome.
 
 


 

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