Application for potential lovahs.

I was e-mailing my friend Rebecca yesterday and told her that I needed to make an application with all sorts of requirements for any man that may spark my fancy.
We'll call them potential lovahs (anyone get the Sex & The City reference?).
She said (& I LOVE this): Look, it's like a Christmas wish list. You know you may not get it all, but you should get MOST of it.

SO. Being the huge dork that I am, I thought - how fun would it be to make an application for all the men who want date me (read: 0)???

So, without further ado, here is my application with requirements!
(Ladies & gays, please feel free to use this as your own dating pre-req.)

Name:
Age:
Astrological Sign (if you're a Sagittarius or Cancer, please don't bother filling the rest of this application out):
Are you good with children/Do you like children? (if you answer no to either question, please don't bother filling the rest of this application out):
Occupation:

*That's enough about you. Here are my requirements:

-Must be able to watch LOTR/The Hobbit as many times as I deem necessary.
-Must do own laundry.
-Brush your teeth 3x a day & always carry gum.
-Tell me I'm beautiful at least once a cuddle-sesh.
-If I tell you to fetch me a burrito, do it. Now.
-If you don't laugh at my jokes, go home.
-Cook me food...at least once in a while.
-Get along with my fambam & friendz.
-Be ok with farting.
-Be as funny (or more funny) than me. <--I know this is a feat, we'll work on it.

And that's about it folks. I don't think I'm asking for the moon here. Just your basic, everyday guy who doesn't mind my weird obsession with middle-earth & the fact that I can rip ass like a dude.
Any takers??

So. All jokes aside, let's move on with this bloggy blog.
Thanks everyone for the mega-support from yesterday's post - it's good to have friends & family who love me unconditionally.
And if you don't love me & are just in it for the drama, I don't blame you. This is some good shit over here.

Last night was pretty eventful.
Niki, Levi, & I hung out.
Watched the 1994 UW vs. UO game (THE PICK!) and I sent pretty ugly selfies to my friends (just for shits & giggles):

My under the bridge look.

That could mean transient or troll, you decide.

 

But hey! I clean up pretttttty good:

Holla cleave holla.

 

Oh! And I have a make-up tip for you.
I know how often I rock the no make-up look (way too often), but when I feel like putting a little effort (read: as little as possible) into my look, this is what I do...
TIGHT LINING! I am a huge, huge fan of tight lining. If you don't know what that is, Google it.
They also have videos you can watch to perfect it. I took some progress pics for you to this morning (you're welcome for using both my eyeballs - I forgot to take a pic before I started):

The middle pic is the best example of tight lining. The last pic is tight lining with mascara.
And that is today's look.

Well. That's all I got for ya today.
Gonna hit up the gym today for some legs - should be tons of fun.
Happy hump day.