This blog is all over the place - READ IT ANYWAY!

I inadvertently discovered the best thing ever a few nights ago.
I was having a glass of wine when it was decided we would walk down to Ben & Jerry's (for the 3rd time that week).
I put my glass in the freezer to keep it cold until I returned.
Well. I forgot all about it (gasp!) until the next evening. I opened the freezer & pulled my stemless wine glass out. In it, there was about an inch of slushy, frozen wine.
Not wanting to waste a SINGLE drop, I poured a fresh glass right on top of my Chard o' Slushy.
It kept it cold twice as long on these hot summer nights.

Moral of the story?
I am a genius and 7/11 should pay me dolla dolla bill$ (no, I'm not Ke$ha) for my Chard o' Slushy idea.
Until I am rich & famous, I'm giving y'all the go ahead to prep your wino tendencies the night or morning before you drink and put you some wine in the freezer. Your senses will thank you (or at least your 21 year old self will high five you).

 

As the title of this blog implies, my thoughts are on shuffle today.

 

Anybody remember this awesome song?

I WAS FREAKING OBSESSED WITH THIS SONG.
I hear a song and if it strikes my fancy just right, it'll be on replay for months. Maybe years.
Anyone who has ever lived with me really appreciates this quality about me. PSYCH!
Well, this weekend I am going out on a boat (have no idea what kind, specifics aren't my forte) with Rachel & her main squeeze, Eric.

^^These people.

(Is it super creepy how often I take pictures from people's Facebooks? nope.)

 

If I don't end up dying (AKA if Rachel doesn't kill me because I sing I'M ON A BOAT AND IT'S GOING FAST AND I GOT MY NAUTICAL THEMED PASHMINA AFGHAN over & over), I'm sure I'll have some pretty spectacular pics for ya'll.

Disclaimer: I didn't have to look those lyrics up. I'm just a boss loser like that.

 

Speaking of songs I'm obsessed with moderately enjoy like your average listener:

^^Now there is a whole lotta sauce.

 

HOLY GRAIL.

You guys. This song speaks to me. I kid you not. Justin Timberlake's part was written for me during my difficult time:

And baby

It's amazing I'm in this maze with you

I just can't crack your code

One day you're screaming you love me loud

The next day you're so cold

One day you're here, one day you're there, one day you care

You're so unfair

Sipping from your cup 'til it runneth over

Holy Grail

 

You get the air out my lungs, whenever you need it

And you take the blade right out my heart

Just so you can watch me bleed

And I still don't know why, why I love you so much

And you play this game, in spite, to drive me insane

I got it tattooed on my sleeve, forever in ink

With guess who's name

But I still don't know why, why I love it so much

 

Ah. Music. Does wonders doesn't it?







In other news, I weighed myself this morning.
Back down to 153. That's what eating right and working out (and pooping after 3 days) does for ya!
Minus the 4 bags of Fun Size M'n'Ms I ate yesterday:

Now that I'm headed in the right direction - once again - I have a new desire to really push to hit my next goal.
I've lost 45 pounds (give or take) and I think I'm ready to drop the next 20.
I want to fall in love with myself. I want to look in the mirror & think I'm beautiful.
I want to believe in myself and have the confidence to take my life by the horns...because I don't have anyone to rely on anymore. It's just me now. And I better damn well like her if I have to spend the rest of my life with her.

On that note...drum roll please...the morning selfie!

And for your viewing pleasure, another one!

I am still super sore from my Monday strength training.
I took yesterday off from the gym because I had an appt. during my lunch hour.
Today I'm back in the saddle - IT'S LEG DAY! Here's to being sore in my nether regions.



 

Holla.

Can I just go back to bed?

Ya'll. I AM SO TIRED.
I'm also suffering from why-can't-I-get-over-my-constant-sadness.
Really gross disease, don't Google Image search-it (see? I'm so tired even my jokes suck).

Now, since I'm assuming all my readers are my friends on FB, you may have seen that I am sore as SHIT today from my weight training yesterday.
Like so sore, I couldn't even blow dry my hair. It was just.too.heavy.
It goes without saying what a hottie I am this morning (I did bring my straightener to work so I could primp in the bathroom).

Always a hot mess. Gotta love it.

 

I was whining yesterday about not thinking I was going to be able to do my 10K on Aug. 24th.

I think I may be right.

You see, I am still suffering from shin splints and they really flare up when I run outside. I was on the treadmill for maybe 5 minutes yesterday before I had to call it a day and rejoin the meat heads.

They missed me...

And with a face like that, who wouldn't?

JK JK JK

 

After I Arnold Shwarzenegger'd it, I hit the ladies locker room for some foam rolling.

 

Eat it up, peeps.

 

They see me rollin'

They hatin'

Patrollin'

 

Grindin' to see if they can see me lean

I'm tense, so it ain't easy to be seen

 



You're welcome for the Chamillionaire lyrics.

Yes, I did have to look them up.

#noshame

 



Anyway, last night was nice.

My friend Levi stopped by to check in and make sure I hadn't offed myself hang out.

And then! I got to watch True Blood.

It was cray peeps - it wasn't onDemand, DVRed, or illegally downloaded...turns out HBO replays their shows. IT'S A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE.

I am also slightly obsessed with Anna Paquin.

Hottiewithabodddddyyyy.

 

Well folks - that's all I got for you today.

If anyone needs me I'll be teaching myself to sleep with my eyes open at my desk.







MILF Monday (busted can of biscuits)

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Friday Finale

First and foremost, a very Happy Birthday to the greatest frontman of all time:

Mr. Mick Jagger

 

Now. There are a couple of things we need to discuss. The best way to do this is by list.

 

1. I saw something seriously disturbing this morning. Monopoly is getting rid of "jail time" because kids these days want a faster paced game. Bite me.

 

2. I saw an interview with a juror from Travyon Martin's trial (no, we do not need to discuss our views on this) - but this woman said she is "hurting as much as his mother". Now, there's a bold statement. If I was Travyon's mom, I would slap this woman across the face.

 

3. Has anybody seen the Axe "Keep Your Cool" commercial? They show a timeline of women getting progressively "hotter" AKA thinner with skimpier clothing. Thanks for putting that in my daughter's head.

 

4. Probably the most important, The Hills was on this morning. I love me some LC and Lo.

 

SO. Now that I've got my morning bitch on. I have to admit something to you guys.

After I blogged yesterday and said I had 3 pieces of pizza...I ate a fourth.

I know, I know.

THEN! Marisa, Sarah, Rosalie, & I walked down to Ben & Jerry's. This is becoming a problem.

 

But this happened and it was HILARIOUS.

 

When I got home from work yesterday afternoon, I had a loverly gift waiting for me from Marisa & Ro:

Rosalie selected the green & yellow combo - I couldn't be more proud.

Let's just hope I don't kill it in a week...

 

And now it is Friday - and I'm counting down the hours until I can bail out of here.

Rosalie's little friend came over with Jaime this morning, so I'm getting super cute pics of them.

That makes the time go a tiny bit faster...

And what post is complete without an awesome picture of me in the bathroom at work?

IS IT FREAKING 5 YET!?!?!?

 

PS On today's 10K schedule: 3.5 mile run. Shoot me. 







SO CLOSE!

Let me just start with this: You know when you're doing really good with your eating (read: 1 day) and then you get stuck in an office meeting, skip the gym, & someone says "who wants pizza?!"?
Yeah. That's where I'm at. SO CLOSE to cleaning up these bad habits!

And I maybe had 3 pieces. Whoooooops.

SO! Let's get back to happier/healthier times.
On yesterday's 10K agenda - 2 miles:

BOOM!

 

And then I STRETCHED:

My hips get really stiff after I run.

Rachel suggested the pigeon pose:

I'm obsessed.

 

When I got home I had time for a quick shower & a quick dinner (before Shawn dropped Rosalie off).

I cooked up some chicken breast in coconut oil with Trader Joe's Spicy Peanut Vinaigrette (delish), red bell pepper, and purple onion. I mixed it all in with spaghetti squash.

No joke, I felt like I was eating Pad Thai:

 

It may look like dog vomit, but it sure didn't taste like it!

(I think I'm funny. But I know I'm like a 4 year old boy.)

 

Once Rosalie came home, I gave her a bath and it was pretty much bedtime.

8:57pm is super late and we obviously needed 11 hours of sleep.

When I woke up (at 7am), I basically just brushed my teeth and then sat my butt down on the couch and took a selfie - DUCK LIPS & ALL!!

Hehehehehehehe.

 

Now, remember I said I was in a meeting all morning/early afternoon hence my bingeing on pizza and sacrificing my cross training?

Let me EXPLAIN said meeting.

At first I thought this was a crock of shit, but after today's meeting, I kind of fell in line.

Our company is being analyzed & a lot of things were pretty on-point. I think we were all a little surprised.

As it turns out, my 5 top strengths are:

 

1. Communication: Good with speaking, WRITING, explaining, describing...etc.

2. Consistency: Fairness, balance, clarity & predictability. Not fond of change.

3. Empathy: Share perspective, people drawn to you...etc.

4. Harmony: Seek agreement/common ground, reduce conflict/friction...etc.

5. Woo: Winning others over, good at connecting, mingling...etc.

 

My favorite is obviously woo because I think it is hilarious. WOO!

But I really liked my strengths & I think during a time of extreme self-growth it's important to realize what you are good at.

SO! Thanks to my bosses for figuring it out for me :)

 

While I've been sitting on my lardo ass, I received the BEST PIC EVER of Rosalie from Auntie Marisa who took her out shopping:

 

I die.

SO FREAKING CUTE.

 

Ok. Last but not least. Let's take a vote.

Who would you rather spend your evening with?

 

This evil lady?

 

Or these beautiful people?

 

Decisions, decisions..............

 





 

 



 

 



A Night Alone

Where to begin?

Let's start with last night.
It was LITERALLY the first night I was going to spend entirely alone since Shawn & I broke up.
I know, I'm a loser - but I have had a friend over, had Rosalie, or spent the entire night FaceTiming my family every single evening since we ended things.
Pathetic? Maybe. But hey, when your sanity hangs by a thread, you gotta do what you gotta do.

Let's recap, shall we?
First up: Stopped at Target for a gallon bottle of wine. I really just needed cash back to deposit into Jenni's account for our JT tickets (hope you didn't forget about that, folks).

This will be happening.

And I will revert back to 12 years ago.

 

After depositing $22 (I know, random amount), I bought $10 worth of quarters to do some laundry.

NEVER HAVE I EVER (5 fingers anyone?) bought quarters before.

I felt like I was going to a J.Lo concert and needed something to bounce off her ass.

 

Anyway.

 

I got home & got out of my car. In my hands I held: 4 Tupperware containers (I forget them at work everyday), a coffee cup, my gym clothes, and my jug of wine.

Then, this happened:

 

I CAN'T MAKE THIS SHIT UP.

THIS IS MY REAL LIFE.

 

I hauled all my crap to Sarah's apt., banged on her door & got no answer. I called her. No answer.

So I left everything sitting in front of her door & marched my merry ass to the office.

I called the emergency number & told them that this did not constitute as an "after-hours lockout". Their key BROKE & it was NOT MY FAULT.

Haha, poor lady - she was like, oh honey - don't worry about it. Someone will be onsite in 30 minutes (gggrrreeeaaattt).

Sarah called back & her and Kyle had been on their back patio. The front door was unlocked and I could have let myself in.

Whatever.

 

After I was rescued from my land lady, I poured a glass of vino and watched Step Brothers.

 

I also maybe ate an entire box of Kraft Mac 'n' Cheese.

Awesome.

 

I did laundry, swept my floors, and refrained from contacting people from the outside world.

I got a few texts (which I responded to because I am a nice human)...but otherwise, I spent the evening alone.

And you know what?

It was lovely. I AM A FUN GIRL (bahaha).

 

Oh! I forgot to tell you the highlight of my day yesterday!

My Dutch Bros. stamp card had 10 stamps (so what if they were split over 4 punch cards?).

So, on my lunch I went to get my iced, nonfat, sugar-free latte. They gave me a hot one. WTF?

Who orders a hot latte in 90 degree weather?

So they fixed my order, but gave me the hot one too.

TWO DRINKS FOR FREE (again, I can't make this shit up - not that it is that unbelievable)!

 

I tried to look cute, but when you're sneaking selfies at your desk & Jill sits 4 feet away from you, it's a little awkward. :)

 

Now it's Hump Day (get your mind out of the gutter).

There's about 2 1/2 days left in this work week.

GET SOME!

Who doesn't love a poorly lit mirror selfie?

YOU ARE WELCOME.

 

Until next time.

 

P.S. On my 10K schedule today is a 2 mile run. Consider it OWNED.

 



 





 

 



It melts in your mouth! And on your clothes.

Good morning! Welcome to Tuesday (the worst day of the week).
Has anybody listened to John Fogerty's new album "Wrote a Song for Everyone" full of CCR covers with different artists?
HOP TO IT. Mystic Highway will perk you right up.

Let's start with a pic of the lovely Miss Rosalie Faye.

Marisa sent this one to me yesterday & I enjoyed it.

Quite a bit.

Because she's the cutest kid to ever exist.

FACT.

 

Yesterday was Day 1 of Week 2 of 10K training.

On the list? 35 min. EZ run.

I FREAKING DID IT.

3.25 miles. A DOLLA MAKES ME HOLLA HONEY BOO BOO <---Irrelevant.

I took this pic stretching before my run:

I look so good that close up.

 

Mid-run I got a text from Rachel saying she wasn't feeling very good, but still had to run her 35 min. (REMINDER RACH: YOU CREATED THIS SCHEDULE).

 

I sent her this little diddy for inspiration.

Because I am a great friend.

Whatever. She did the run.

 







Anyway. Remember my mom made me homemade spaghetti sauce?
I made that for dinner last night with some brown rice pasta & a spinach salad.
Niki came over & we walked to Ben & Jerry's for ice cream (I know. 2 days in a row. SHOOT!).

I managed to drip chocolate on my shorts.

 

Aaaaand my shirt.

Classy.

 

We watched Cinderella when we got home & Rosalie played with (possibly) the most annoying toy on earth.

But she was damn cute doing it!

 

Rosalie zonked out around 8pm and slept like, 13 hours.

Anyone else insanely jealous of my 20 month old?

Show of hands...

 

Ok. Well. That's about it.

Oh! Can't leave you without my morning selfie!

 

Where's Waldo?

HA! Anyone? Anyone?

 

I really want my leftover spaghetti. Is 10:12am too early for lunch?

Later gatorz.





You Can't Always Get What You Want

But if you try sometimes, you might find, you get what you need.

If you didn't know this about me (then we've probably never spoken in real life), I am the worlds biggest Rolling Stones fan. Minus my dad's two best friends.

Anyway, this song is playing as I type & it speaks the TRUTH.
Maybe you don't want things to happen the way they happen.
But in all honesty, you probably need them to.

Ok. Let's rewind, shall we?
I left you on Wednesday and embarked on my 1.5 mile run:

I know! Slow down there, Hiskey!

 

I ended up doing a little over 2 miles:

 

Hey now, I never said I was D'Anthony Thomas.

I just DO IT.

Anyway, the track at Churchill was closed so Jen and I found an alternate route.

Let's just say, I'm pretty sure drug dealers were lurking around every bush. Why?

 

 

Yeah. That's a freaking needle. AH!

 

Once I got home, I chilled with Rach for a little bit & then got to go pick up Rosalie.

REUNION!

 

I swear, she ages about 6 months every time I go a day or two without seeing her.

 

Wednesday night was pretty mellow.

Rach & I went to fat girl heaven AKA Papa Soul Food.

You know, their beef brisket was just OK, but I got down on their mac 'n' cheese.

After we got home, Niki & Mal bopped by.

Rosalie wowed everyone with her cuteness & then off to bed she went.

 

Thursday morning we met Marisa at Studio 41 (18? 22? I don't remember the number) for breakfast.

I got blueberry pancakes and was not impressed.

Rosalie was in high spirits though:

What. A. Doll.

 

On our drive home from breakfast we were stopped at a red light right next to my friend, Courtney.

We followed her back to her house to see her girlfriend, Pettie & their fabulous new home.

Then they offered to help me move on Friday.

SO. FREAKING. NICE.

And we could not have done it without them.

I headed home to meet my mom, so we could go couch shopping:

 

This beaut will be delivered in 4-6 weeks.

LOVE IT.

 

After spending the day with Rosalie and my mom, we stopped at Don Juan's for my fave: CHICKEN CARNITAS.

Oh my gerrrd, you guys, I could drink that sauce with a dang straw. Yum.

AND! Rosalie ate a quesadilla!!!!! I have the pickiest eater ever, so if she eats anything other than popsicles and fruit, I'm pretty much on cloud nine.

 

She also ate a bunch of salsa.

She's obsessed with Mexican food, just like her momma.

 

Friday morning came too quick & I dropped Ro off with her dad.

Then my mom and I got to moving.

We moved every. single. thing. on Friday.

Plus cleaned my entire house so that it was decent for Shawn & Rosalie.

We were EXHAUSTED.

Oh. And for food on Friday?

Biscuits & gravy, 5 buck lunch (cheeseburger, fries, Diet Pepsi, and a hot fudge sundae) from DQ, harvest chicken salad from Quiznos, & 2 7 margaritas.

What a long day.

Here's what I looked like Saturday morning:

 

Right?

 

Saturday was no rest day.

We unpacked EVERYTHING. Every last box. Every last bag.

And we shopped for those stupid things you always seem to need when you move.

We ate a tiny bit better.

Eggs, turkey sausage, strawberries for breakfast, turkey sandwiches with Sun Chips & strawberries for lunch, and a ginormous pizza for dinner. Plus some more margaritas. And maybe some wine.

 

Sunday was less go! go! go!

Although my mom did make me homemade spaghetti sauce, we grocery shopped, & Sarah and I ran some errands.

Then Sarah's mom came over with Sarah's niece and we had a swimming date.

I could barely keep my eyes open & passed out for about an hour yesterday afternoon.

I don't even remember what we ate.

Except I do remember an impromptu trip to Ben & Jerry's last night. WHOOPS!

 

Finally Rosalie arrived around 7:45 and it was great to be together again.

 

And now. It is Monday.

I should have taken today off just to recover.

Here's this morning's selfie:

You can't tell but my body is covered in bruises and I still have sunglasses on from driving to work at 7:30. Because I forgot they were on my head.

Awesome.

 

SOOOOO...does anybody remember that 10K I'm training for?

I haven't done anything since Wednesday. So I've missed: cross training, 2.5m run, rest day, and 1.5m run.

I'm picking back up today with a 35 min. EZ run.

I'll probably keel right over. 

And I am doing it on the treadmill.

Freaking bite me.

 

OK! That was an amazing blog.

Please, no autographs.